How Does It Feel to Befriend an ESTJ?
To an ESTJ, friends are secondary to their family. Others are often drawn to ESTJs outgoing and enthusiastic nature, and they are usually well-liked by others. ESTJs generally seek out friends who are like themselves — someone who is dependable and smart and shares the same interests and values as themselves. Their friendships center on trust and loyalty. Friends of ESTJs never have to worry about an ESTJ betraying them.
ESTJs are very aware of their own and others’ social status. They are drawn to others who are well-liked, successful, and respected. However, ESTJs heightened awareness of social status can sometimes become overly concerned with their social status. They may become preoccupied with getting others to like them.
ESTJs seek strong friendships founded on trust and loyalty (though loyalty to family does come first). Active and with quick minds, people with the ESTJ personality type can’t ever be accused of not doing enough to fend off a little boredom. While ESTJs may not always be the life of the party, they know how to play their part in making sure their friends have a good time.
The way ESTJs establish and maintain their friendships does limit the pool though, as they tend to seek out people who are similar to themselves, who share their respect for traditions and institutions. ESTJ personalities are naturally stubborn, and it can be hard for them to find enough common ground with people who constantly disagree with their principles and beliefs to really form those ties of friendship.
ESTJs’ challenge in friendship isn’t about finding fun things to do or people to do them with, but in finding diversity in their friends and activities. For all their community participation, ESTJs struggle immensely in even fully listening to differing opinions, let alone befriending people who consistently express alternate viewpoints. Whether about local political issues or the validity of a more emotional, idealistic disposition than they think is reasonable, ESTJs should make an effort to truly understand these alternate viewpoints.
Simply put, it’s healthy for ESTJs to have some loyal opposition.
Exposing themselves to new ideas among acquaintances who think differently can do no harm — either people with the ESTJ personality type discover better ways and a stronger foundation, or they gain all the more confidence in their beliefs for having successfully defended them. Just as ESTJs may think those loners who spend their lives in their basements playing video games need to get out more, ESTJs themselves need to make sure they get out of their own bubbles of unchallenged opinions and beliefs.
The ESTJ Friend
Loyal and down-to-earth, ESTJs make dedicated and industrious friends. Strongly opinionated and usually talkative, it’s easy for friends to know where they stand on things. Their “tell it like it is” honesty paired with their loyalty makes them refreshing friends for people who like those who care enough to “keep it real”. ESTJs are hard-working, but they also enjoy going on adventures with their friends and embarking on hands-on projects together. They like recreational pursuits and are highly competitive, so whether they’re throwing a football or playing a game of Monopoly they’re sure to be engaged. ESTJs prioritize being reliable, trustworthy and helpful and they appreciate when their friends acknowledge their efforts.
Characteristics of the ESTJ Friend:
- Dedicated
- Responsible
- Pragmatic
- Logical
- Hard-Working
- Loyal
- Direct
- Blunt
- Outgoing
- Competitive
- Helpful
That’s all for this article, see you in the next article!
Love,
Fristy
References
My Personality Test. (2022). ESTJ — The coordinators — Friendships. https://my-personality-test.com/personality-type-indicator/estj/estj-personal-relationship/estj-friendships
16 Personalities. (2013, August 1). Friendships | Executive (ESTJ) personality | 16Personalities. 16Personalities. https://www.16personalities.com/estj-friends
Psychology Junkie. (2019, March 6). Here’s What You’re Like as a Friend, Based On Your Myers-Briggs Personality Type. https://www.psychologyjunkie.com/2019/03/06/heres-what-youre-like-as-a-friend-based-on-your-myers-briggs-personality-type/
